I’m recording a little song for my upcoming podcast. I had a lot of inspiration last week and I’m trying to recreate that moment. Its difficult away from the immediacy of white washing display crates. I was shown on an art handling IG page, talking about thinking outside of the box. The struggle continues. I’m doing something in a couple of weeks I want to talk about but I can’t for reasons I won’t get into, I think it’s a good idea. I’m working on a few poems for the painting I’ve been producing. The piece yesterday, “Supercollider” I got a lot of emotion from the recent deaths in the news. I saw a lot of the smile of someone really close to me in the faces of Charleena Lyles and Nabra Hassanen. Both hate crimes, it makes me but relieved in some ways that my loved ones are safe relatively, its the feeling of condolences and knowing that our lives are so fragile. The imperative nature of dismantling all these racist power structures is an every day feeling, it doesn’t make it any more easy or right or tragic even that antiblack and antimuslim hate is so pervasive that latinx police get off for killing black people just like white cops, or that someone can stalk and kill a young woman because of road rage and then be investigated for their status as a citizen. The whole debate is twisted. I ‘m just thinking about my priorities. Prioritizing making my life one of deep meaning and not the product of violence is my act of creation and liberation. As I leave my house today I will still think of the likelyhood of being stopped by police and being gunned down for doing nothing but breathing on a bad day. I wonder what blindness must be like in this time.